Makeup tips

"Christian dudes are so much more attractive"


p.s: I'll be going on a mini hiatus (cough*until infinite's comeback*cough) because finals are in 2 weeks (what.) and I have a mountain (everest) load of things to do. 
(But God can move mountains)

This song. 

Satisfied In You

I have lost my appetite /And a flood is welling up behind my eyes/ So I eat the tears I cry/ And if that were not enough/ They know just the words to cut and tear and prod/ When they ask me “Whereʼs your God?”/ Why are you downcast, oh my soul?/ Why so disturbed within me?/ I can remember when you showed your face to me/ As a deer pants for water so my soul thirsts for you/ And when I behold your glory/ You so faithfully renew/ Like a bed of rest for my fainting flesh/ I am satisfied in you/ When Iʼm staring at the ground/ Itʼs an inbred feedback loop that brings me down/ So itʼs time to lift my brow/ And remember better days/ When I loved to worship you in all your ways/ With the sweetest songs of praise/ Why are you downcast oh my soul?/ Why so disturbed within me?/ I can remember when you showed your grace to me/ As a deer pants for water so my soul thirsts for you/ And when I survey your splendour/ You so faithfully renew Like a bed of rest for my fainting flesh/ I am satisfied in you/ Let my sighs give way to songs that sing about your faithfulness/ Let my pain reveal your glory as my only real rest/ Let my losses show me all I truly have is you/ Cause all I truly have is you/ So when Iʼm drowning out at sea/ And your breakers and your waves crash down on me/ Iʼll recall your safety scheme/ Youʼre the one who made the waves/ And your Son went out to suffer in my place/ And to tell me that Iʼm safe/ Why am I down? Why so disturbed?/ I am satisfied in you

Freedom.
For me it always meant being free from anything that holds me down
or prevents me from something I'd rather be
...isn't that selfish?
But freedom IS, in a sense, "constraining"
...seems contradictory, doesn't it?
Like if I really wanted (or pushed myself) to do something to achieve a certain goal
say, to study really hard to get that desired grade, (I'm a nerd what can I say)
I'm constraining myself by investing my time into my school work
(when I can very well be doing many other liberating things as freely as I want)
because I know that if I work hard,
I will achieve that sense of "freedom"
in the end.
Essentially, I've deliberately lost or given up my "freedom"
to get to a greater sense of "freedom".
I don't know what I'm trying to get at...
something along the lines of, giving up your freedom to find another freedom
I guess?...
And the ultimate freedom?
It's love.
CHRIST's love.

For a love relationship to be healthy there must be a mutual loss of independence. It can't be just one way. Both sides must say to the other, "I will adjust to you. I will change for you. I serve you even though it means a sacrifice for me." (...) At first sight, a relationship with God seems inherently dehumanizing. Surely it will have to be "one way," God's way. God, the divine being, has all the power. I must adjust to God-there is no way that God could adjust to and serve me. While this may be true in other forms of religion and belief in God, it's not true in Christianity. In the most radical way, God has adjusted to us-in his incarnation and atonement. In Jesus Christ he became a limited human being, vulnerable to suffering and death. On the cross, he submitted to our condition-as sinners-and died in our place to forgive us. In the most profound way, God has said to us, in Christ, "I will adjust to you. I will change for you. I'll serve you though it means a sacrifice for me."

---The Reason for God by Timothy Keller, p.50

Because of this love, the love of Christ...
I am trying to learn to give up my freedom to find freedom in him.